Wednesday, June 24, 2009

How will I know when I'm ready for kids?

I'm getting to that age, when people look at me and hint around that maybe you should think about settling down and having kids. Well, let's talk about this for a minute.

First of all, I am not in a relationship, nor do I want to be. I think that this is a prerequisite when it comes to having children. However, my reasons for not being in a relationship are fairly straight forward. My life is hectic and busy (I work a lot and go to school). I'm not exactly why - decided that having a career and going to school was a good decision, but I'll chalk that up to you live in learn. My concern is, my plates are balanced perfectly and adding on more stress would bring it crashing down.

Now some have tried and failed to convince me that being in a relationship is a good thing because it can relieve stress. I observe, on the other hand, that it usually adds stress, especially if the other person is a grad school widow. My good friend got really upset with me the other day about my rationale... And I mean upset. They next day she wrote me a sweet note
saying that she doesn't want me to say I don't want a relationship because that'll close me off to the possibility of one and "I'm too good of a catch" to not try. Aww isn't she sweet???

What I observe as I go out (note I said no relationships not dates - this is a key distinction) a lot of the men "my age" want a relationship. Why can't we just have fun and be stress free???

Anyway... To my second point - babies don't do anything for me. I'm still of the opinion that they just sit around and cry. Boring! I wonder if I'll ever get to the point where I'll swoon over babies.

My third point - I wouldn't mind having kids if I could have ones that are four and over you see I love being able to play and interact with kids. For instance, this weekend, I had a family wedding. Instead of sitting in a corner with the adults, I was dancing with my second cousins (ages between 10 and 5). Now I have two theories regarind my behavior: I really enjoy dancing but since I am so terrible at it the only people who would tolerate me dancing with them are children, and secondly I am a kid at heart and just like to sweat it out with the little ones.

Hmm... Perhaps the signs are pointing to me being a great aunt - no pressure brother! Or just waiting until I'm ready for kids.

Will keep you updated.

1 comment:

telisa5 said...

Wait til your ready and tell everyone else to screw off..or at least that's what i've been doing the last 10 years :) btw the average age of marriage is 29 (not 18 as some people seem to believe)..we still have a bit for we're older-than-average